Monday, September 21, 2015

Smile. Breathe.Go Slow

                                  SMILE. BREATHE. GO SLOW

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I must admit that I cannot miss reading posts from my favourite bloggers every morning though I have not been able to share my views in their space. (I prefer it to newspaper since they guarantee smile and would not disturb me for the rest of the day). But, I have not been able to write a line for a long time. Busy fighting battles which now feels like they are falling in place. I mean the right place. Thanks to all the worries for getting softer on me.

Does the post title sound like I have been practising this mantra and I am here to share my gyaan? Then, you are wrong.

This is one line that I read very recently and it stuck so hard and never want to leave me. For good :)

I am basically a busy bee. I like to be one. Productive all day and learning something new every single day (ideal case - but always deviates from the standard. Isn't it?-;). Each day I have a common expectation. I want to feel proud good at the end of the day when I look at myself in the mirror. A sense of satisfaction. You are in a strange land on earth in the name of onsite due to your husband’s job. Thousands of miles away from where you belong. You sit and watch the seasons change but the problems being stubborn to move an inch? Fighting the visa and work permit problems left, right and centre. Ah! Wait- 360 degrees precisely.. Huh! Crazy and bumpiest ride I am on. It is taking good turns lately, though.

Oh, am I sounding frustrated and pissed off in life here? Honest to God, I am that hundred times greater than you could think. But that is not what I want to share with you today. I will highlight the positive shade here.

Something that has kept my company of late is my mistakes. I have learnt few lessons through some; some were volatile and forgotten and am sailing through most of them. Every person I met, every incident that has occurred and every time I have lost my senses in depression there is something new that sprang in my mind. I am very glad; hmm ok proud to see myself growing strong each day. I stumble at times for obvious reasons lose hope, drown in self-doubt, but- I fall in track once I bounce up. At least, after I give it some time. 

Here are few things that has made me feel better:

1) This too shall pass: 

(Thanks to Vidya  for her recent post. She is such an inspiration and a smile bomb)

I told this to myself every day. Argh! I have wasted months in disappointment and worries to get here! :( . If there is something permanent on earth that I can remember is- NOTHING. So was my problem. So, hold on there and wait for it to pass. The wait is not easy but definitely worth it. Once the good times are your balcony, you will get busy to remember the worries you once dwelled in. That's the magic of time. So, you know what to do- give it some time.

2) Be Nice to yourself:

I have to confess right now that I am very harsh on myself (Ok, I sit in front of the mirror). To the contrast, I can even forgive my enemy knowing the fact that every person has his/her shade of goodness. But to me, I am one obsessively compulsive perfectionist. This is definitely not right. It's ok that one makes mistakes. It's ok to put on some weight. It's ok to go wrong. It's ok to not know things. It's ok to plan an elaborate cooking to see it end up all charred and burnt. It's ok to be sick. It's ok to get tanned..It's ok to get insulted or embarrassed. I mean, why we are so serious and strict masters to ourselves?
 Give oneself some liberty. Go smooth on yourself. Life is not run in ICU's to be serious. It is supposed to it nice and pleasant. 

Wear a smile. Daily. This simple therapy works miracles. 
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3) Health first- listen to your body

With all the gush and rush of worries one would not know the havoc that is caused to the body. I mean the hangama caused by harmones.So beware!. The gradual  change in the body in worrisome scenarios are mostly neglected. In fact, there will be bio-signals sent by the body as alerts. These are something that cannot be ignored. Once left unattended, they get piled up and awaits the worse to occur. Health must not be neglected at any cost. This includes eating healthy food, taking medicines on time, stayed hydrated, exercising daily   often. It might occur to us that while dealing with a hefty problem in front of us, minor things like eating on time or stretching your body can be compromised. It can be, if you are ready to pay a huge penalty for it.

Meanwhile, there are a class of people who are hypochondriac (fear of having all the diseases on earth- roughly). Over thinking, over analyzing, false assumptions, unnecessary fear that you will be diseased, negative thoughts are some of the possessively owned assets to such class. It will affect both physical and mental health.

In both the extremes, we are bound to listen to our body -stay positive and healthy.

4) Know your limits of control

In one of the TED talks I heard a gentleman say this line : " Ask yourself, what is in your hands?" It stuck to me like an arrow till today and forever.
What ever can be controlled, can be controlled. Something that is not in our control, why bang our heads towards them? Isn't it sheer waste of time and energy? Ask me how many times I have done this. Trying to act like a superwoman who can control every aspect of my life troubling me .With time, I only was able to draw a thick line between the two categories. The Controllable and the Uncontrollable. Last but not least to say, if something you know is under your control, then what are you waiting for? Pull up your sleeves, get your hands dirty and take charge. Put your heart, soul and mind into it. Nobody can stop you from success

5) Talk to yourself

Mixed signals of commotion, diminishing clarity for what is needed and what efforts are required, whirlpool of confusion spinning you in all angles.. oh the list never ends.
These are common problems not just me but everyone will be facing. Follow any method- you lock up yourself and talk to the mirror or the walls, write a letter to yourself, go in mental vicious circles; do whatever. But spare some time for self talk. It will dust out the unnecessary and filters what is required. Like some mining- actually. It just doesn’t help but also  heals. We might be doing the talking with friends, family, spouse or anybody who matter to us. It does aid to deal with a circumstance but having clarity from within changes the entire game .For good. 

Be there for yourself, for no one knows you better than you.

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6) KISS  - Keep it Simple and smart

Life is complex to those who give it a personal invitation to complexity- direct door delivery. For those who know how to live, they keep it simple. It is not an unexplained complex phenomenon in which the owner cannot predict or de-cipher the structured algorithms with infinite loops. Life is beautiful. Life is fun. Life is about sharing. Life is about a bonding, about a passion. A cute drama. Life is anything that you want it to be. A blank sheet in front of you. The best parker pen is given to you. You write or scribble whatever you want. Call it the fate. Upto you. Nothing unwritten will appear without your consent. So there you go- make it or mar it. Keep it simple, easy and smart. 

Glide on the tides of time.
I am sleepy to think of a rhyme.

Choice is yours - Live or exist
Until I decide, swirls of thoughts persist

One lovely life - admire it every day
kick the unpleasant past and let the present stay

Self love and self-care are a must
the regrets and worry are gone with the dust

Share to care and wear a smile
the little things takes you an extra mile

Things are like that- cranky and fuzzy
don’t let the hope wither- it will make your way easy

So you tell me how you tackle things when you are low?
I repeat my mantra- Smile, breathe and go slow :):)

P.S: I heard you say that, and I go by that. It is impromptu poetry for the day. Fun and message intended though! :):)


A word with me! Thanks for dropping by:)