New Year, New Story

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This post is a part of #ALPxGUN BlogHop #BollyExpress hosted by Alpana and PraGun
 and sponsored by – Unorthodoxpeeps, RangPotli, ExploreKidsWorld, SoulfulFood and, Praggatti Rao

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It was hesitance topped with loads of fear. Like intense fear, which grew each day. 

Constantly. A fake all-is-OK smile brushed her wretched depression under the carpet in the

 day, only to resurface on the cold and lonely nights. Panic attacks kept her company.

It was that time of the year again, when she had long left home taking the train to the

land unknown. On that snowy Christmas night as she stood frozen, inside, and outside.

A gruel some 3 Christmas nights had passed since then.

A trunk of her memories full of photographs once clicked passionately with her husband.

Countless in number.

Each picture, each story. Story of lie, betrayal and hurt.

A treasure she taught for life, a haunted memory it turned into.

Just a look at them, splashed all the agony, fury, melancholy in front of her.

Like a rapid flood. Destroying her little world.

she had lost the count of nights she cried and yelled forcing herself to sleep.

Those screams. Those cuts on her wrists. Those old scars. And the news ones. 

Apart from her workplace in the daytime, she mostly locked herself drowning in her sorrow.

Separating from the rest. To the familiar monster. Self-surrender.

Like an old habit, refusing to leave. The routine did not change much.

 It should have been more than 1000 days and 1000 nights.

At sunrise and sunset Bella was not one person but two different ones.

Bipolar and PTSD was consuming her every moment.

She dragged herself from bed, rolled in the bathrooms, experienced rush of emotions,

fear of people, stench of her past, tugging her.

Christmas came, and so did her inconsolable story.

As she finished her popcorn on one freezing night, in front of the fireplace,

Bella sprang up from her cozy sofa. She opened the suitcase rather hesitantly

looked at the photographs carefully. Like before she did not run away, did not escape from herself. 

Today was different. Like totally unexpected of her.

 As she flipped each photograph, clenching pain, gritting anger, fighting tears she did not move.  

She sat still. Like any other day she accepted what she went through.

She came to terms that it was not her mistake. 

May be Santa had a different plan for her.

To give this young girl the life she deserved. The life with self-love.

The sleep she missed, the time she lost regretting, the people who wanted Bella,

the universe which was waiting to conspire to her.

 She was tired of being alone, she felt awful doing what she has been doing.

 Exhausted of the story she kept telling herself. She wanted to change. No, transform.

Tell a different story this time.

 It was not her fault that Her husband cheated on her by choosing her friend over Bella’s love.

 Her trust was broken. Her dreams shattered. Clueless and helpless.
 Self-deterioration she had taken to. 

As if everything has an end, that night was not the same.

She was surprised. Shook hands mentally with that chirpy young woman.

Her old happy self. She did not curse or cringe or felt revenge.

 As if the angels sat next to her, she felt calm, smiled at the lovely woman in the picture.

Missed her. Ignoring the male figure in them, she said sorry to herself.

She was the heroine and the villain of the painful story she had written.

 A new spirit surged her every nerve. Her body cells pleaded for chance to live. 
Her heart, a sprint away, from a new life in front of her. 
That moment, she wanted to end all the self-wallow.

She crushed her story mentally. Into crumbles. Flushed it.

Took a vow of happiness. A promise to herself.

Never to harm but to love. This lovely woman.

As she raised a toast to the new beginnings, her new self, Bella felt full of life.

A real smile this time visited her after eons.

As the clock ticked past her darkness, Bella found herself as a gift, this Christmas.

 The grey clouds shifted as the night passed and only sunshine filled her new world .

 Bella lived happily ever after.

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P.S : Tried to combine and connect all the picture prompts and weaved a story around it.